A few days ago I was in the island of Trinidad doing a seminar on stress and success.
Trinidad is known for Calypso, Carnival, and it has lots of oil. This is one of the largest islands in the Caribbean and it is quite well developed. The people are doing quite well considering the global financial situation. I have always regarded Trinidadians as very happy people.
After one of my presentations my driver took me to a Roti Shop to treat me to a typical Trinidad Roti. Trinidad is famous for its roti and my driver was taking me to the best roti shop in the Caribbean.
There was a long line but in about 15 minutes I was seated and soon afterwards I was enjoying the best of Trinidad and washing it down with spring water from Tobago.
Was that roti delicious or what! It had everything in it and I can’t wait to go back to Trinidad where I will be conducting my Caribbean Success Retreat in April 2014. If you don’t come for the life changing retreat, come for the roti. I promise you will not be disappointed.
When the bill arrived, my driver insisted that he pay for the roti. I objected with vehemence because I knew that I he only makes a fraction of what I make. He could have come off as a very generous fellow and still not have to pay but I could not change his mind, he wanted to pay.
When I accepted the favor and thanked him for his generosity, you should have seen the look of joy and pride on his face. You would have sworn that he won the lottery. He acted as if he got the advantage, as if he got the better part, and he drove with more energy and optimism after we left the roti shop.
Why was he so happy when he merely forced himself to spend money he could ill afford? He gave, I received, and as you know it is always better to give than to receive. Actually having money or receiving gives no joy, only giving results in joy says Henry Drummond.
On the way from the Roti Shop, I asked him about himself.
When he told me that he was 49 years old, I was astounded. I thought he was about 29 years old. And he was handsome and healthy looking as well.
Apart from his main job as a driver, he makes cassava cakes on some of his days off and sells them to a few high-end restaurants. His cakes are very popular and he does well financially with this part time occupation.
As he drove me around he told me that many other restaurants want his cakes but he does not want to “kill himself out” just to make more money.
“Doc, I was standing at the back of your seminar, and I heard you say that happiness is the prize in life, and I am happy the way I am. I have a house and I can meet my needs. More money would not necessarily make me happier and look at what it would take to get more money – time. My boss is always complaining that he has no time. So in a sense I am richer than he is because time is more valuable than money.”
In my proverbial zest to motivate this man, I asked him what makes him happy and he said:
- “I arrange my life so I can spend a lot of time with my 12 year old son. I take him to the park often where we play together for hours sometimes. We often go to the beach together and I feel I have time to pass on to him while he is still young, the valuable lessons that I have learnt. This makes me really happy when I think about my role as a father.
- I have a woman I live with and we spend a lot of time together as well. We go dancing on the weekend and we go out on drives and walks and have long conversations. I feel our relationship is getting richer and I am trying to save some money so we can have a decent wedding. This relationship really makes me happy and I can’t wait to go home at the end of my shift to see her even after we have been together for over 12 years.
- The third thing that makes me happy is my spiritual awareness. I somehow feel that there is more to me than just my work and family and sometimes I feel like there is a superior being around me and I take time to be alone and to communicate with him and when I do I feel a strong sense of happiness deep inside.
- I also feel very happy at work. I love to help people. I have a lot to do sometimes but I never like to show that I am busy. When a customer asks me where a certain department is, instead of telling them, I actually accompany them, and as we talk, I find out more about them and I am often able to relieve some stress. You should know about that doc.
So all in all my life is good and I don’t want anything in my life to destroy the happiness I feel. I really want to protect my happiness because I was not always happy and I don’t want to start taking happiness for granted.”
At about this point we were close to the Hyatt Hotel near the water where I stayed. He then started telling me about his brother and that blew me away. It was so unusual. It is a mysterious tale about his brother’s involvement with the supernatural. But I will tell you about it in my next Happiness Report. Don’t miss it.
If you think my driver is interesting and different, just wait until I tell you about his brother. Until then let me remind you that “money is useless unless you can turn it into joy.”